an update on .:jessica:.

or bad parenting, rather. but then again kittens weren’t supposed to be at our house in the first place. except that some sadist decided to throw two female newborns in a box in the longkang in front of our house late last month and if we hadn’t taken them in they would’ve died. (usually sadists dump grown dogs on our street, but this one decided to top the rest.)

we’ve told dad dozens of times that this particular kitten (pictured below) knows how to slide down the car hood onto the floor but dad as usual didn’t listen. takes out rubbish, returns, finds kitten dying on floor in the territory of our temperamental dog. dad took it out on the dog, which pissed me off…i mean what can you expect if we praise Big Dog for mousehunting and he kills what he thinks is equal to a small mouse?

but that episode’s over and things have blown over…except that the remaining kitty has no place to go when it matures. right now this raccoon-faced feline is content with nibbling and pseudo-pouncing on my ten animated fingers (meaning its teeth or claws aren’t sharp enough yet), as well as exploring the great outdoors (under supervision, of course).

she eats solids, has a more normal dirty-green eye colour now (instead of these amazing blues) and has grown an inch since this picture was last taken in the early days.

anybody want a kitty? i’m serious.

disturbing news indeed, the events that have occured in this month alone.

it all started with the penang by-election in august when a speaker said the “Chinese were only immigrants (Orang Cina cuma tumpang di sini) and it was impossible for them to achieve equal rights among races.” his party apologised, not him.

then, 3 newspapers were issued show-cause letters, following which the reporter whose article highlighted the speaker’s remarks, plus a blogger and an MP were detained under the ISA – all of them civilians. the de facto law minister resigned in protest of this but had his resignation letter rejected.

the reporter, who was arrested for her own safety because her life was “under threat” was released in a day, while the speaker was merely suspended for 3 years and had vowed to make a comeback.

the MP, whose supposed rally to suppress prayer calls was denied by the mosque authorities in question, was freed after a week but had a molotov cocktail thrown into her family home last Saturday with a letter calling her a pig and an expletive, and asking her and her family to watch out or face the threat of an arson-related death.

the blogger, whose political website was banned by the government for a week, is scheduled to be detained for 2 years.

related links:
my 18 hours under the ISA (the reporter’s account)
interview (with the MP)
open letter calling for ISA repeal (by de facto law minister)
immigrant claims (on the speaker)

p.s. selamat hari raya – here’s to an uneventful, peaceful raya month ahead.

this year marks the first time i tried juggling both the singapore and malaysia 40-day pray & fast booklets, both set around the same time (40 days prior to each nation’s independence day). it was quite a challenge to go through each day’s items over 45 minutes or an hour of lunch and i’m glad to have made it through.

my experience using the singapore booklet first time (the focus this year was on low-income foreigners): it felt kinda weird that a foreigner was praying and fasting for foreigners, haha, but in that sense it was also relatable, because their needs were no different from any foreigner’s.

as for taking part in malaysia’s pray & fast for the 4th year: it also felt a bit weird to be praying for the country while in another country (most of the time), haha, but thankfully prayer knows no boundaries. and it was interesting to follow a new format that focused on scripture-based prayer instead of being guided by prayer pointers.

why can’t we just count cards for a living? or be born with silver spoons in our mouths?

Time To Pretend
by MGMT

I’m feeling rough, I’m feeling raw, I’m in the prime of my life
Let’s make some music, make some money, find some models for wives
I’ll move to Paris, shoot some heroin, and fcuk with the stars
You man the island and the cocaine and the elegant cars

This is our decision, to live fast and die young
We’ve got the vision, now let’s have some fun
Yeah, it’s overwhelming, but what else can we do?
Get jobs in offices, and wake up for the morning commute

Forget about our mothers and our friends
We’re fated to pretend
To pretend
We’re fated to pretend
To pretend

I’ll miss the playgrounds and the animals and digging up worms
I’ll miss the comfort of my mother and the weight of the world
I’ll miss my sister, miss my father, miss my dog and my home
Yeah, I’ll miss the boredem and the freedom and the time spent alone

There is really nothing, nothing we can do
Love must be forgotten, life can always start up anew
The models will have children, we’ll get a divorce
We’ll find some more models, everything must run its course

We’ll choke on our vomit and that will be the end
We were fated to pretend
To pretend
We’re fated to pretend
To pretend

Yeah, yeah, yeah
Yeah, yeah, yeah
Yeah, yeah, yeah
Yeah, yeah, yeah

hey girl, i miss you.

you didn’t eat for a week but mom kept lying about your situation. and i was too busy being preoccupied with things at the other country to notice you were dying and if i didn’t save you, no one else would.

i’m sorry i failed you when you needed me most. i’m sorry you had to suffer close to two hours of literal death pangs, cough out bodily fluids and stiffen up before you left us in the middle of sunday night to early monday morning — when you could’ve received medical treatment instead and lived.

but i am not sorry for the times we spent together and the inseperable bond we shared. and i am certainly not sorry i was by your side this time and wild horses parents couldn’t drag me away — whatever it took to lessen your howls of pain and return the favor of companionship one last time.

your siblings and i miss you deeply. and i am still grieving. but you will always live in my memories…and i hope to hold you again. sleep well, fondest friend fibi.